Parents of human children tell that over time they learn to identify the various screams and what they mean. A frustrated scream; give me my toy back. An annoyed scream; I don’t like what you are doing. I’ve fallen down cry; might need intervention after you’ve finished your cup of tea. A broken bone scream; rare, but needs intervention now. But when there is silence is when the real mischief is happening.
As a parent of doggy children I’ve learnt to identify the various puppy sounds. The excited, let’s play bark. The frustrated I want your bone bark replied by a don’t get too close to my bone growl. The clatter of the broom being dragged from the cupboard (sacrifice it in the name of minimal damage). The crack and pop of my ventolin inhaler cap being destroyed; requires limited intervention to rescue the cartridge. But the real damage is done during periods of silence. This is the witching hour sometime between 6 a.m. and 7 a.m.
Yes, that’s when I have the most fun (until you come and spoil it)!
Are we going now?
It’s fun being a farm dog.
I get to ride in the back of a pickup and put my head out of the window and get my ears flapping and smell interesting things.
And fall out.
Um, yes that did happen. Once.
I hope that’s the last time. Just as well I was watching and saw it coming.
Oh, and I get to eat interesting things.
We won’t go into that!
Look, we kept your space for you (the old bed).
So what do you think of the new bed?
Oh, it’s a really nice mattress with memory foam and all that.
No, I meant do you appreciate the extra space on top.
Yes, wider by a whole 15cm and longer by 20cm. I actually bought it for me.
Oh. Well it is nice and firm.
Great. I thought you’d appreciate that. Now will you move over, please!
This is the new mattress? We like it!
It was a sacrificial box, placed there intentionally for your entertainment.
Well, I trashed it!
I noticed. It didn’t take long either.
Just you wait until I get my real, adult teeth.
Hmm. I am not looking forward to it.
Oh, I am!
Just you wait for the real teeth!